Nourished by His will...

Throughout the past week I found myself saying, "I just can't seem to get full."  It felt like I was always looking for something...a sandwich, a donut, raisins, an apple, an extra helping at dinner, too many brownies for dessert.

In John chapter 4, after long hours of ministry and travel the disciples thought Jesus might be needing physical nourishment and they urged him to eat food they had brought for him and he said...

32: I have food that you know nothing about.
34: My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work.

And I wondered-is that only for Jesus?  Is he the only one with that food?  Is there work still to be finished or was it completed when Jesus returned to his Father?  And so I kept reading...

35: I tell you open your eyes and look at the fields!  They are ripe for harvest.

So today I feel even more like the woman at the well.  Not only do I need that living water, but I need that food too!  The food that nourishes my body so different from the soul nourishment that can only come from my Father.  When I reach for something extra, what really am I reaching for?

A bored moment to be filled?
An anxious moment to be calmed?
A long day to be sweetened?
A lonely moment to be kept company?
And will I be full then or will I just keep reaching because all of those things could never compare to my Father's food?
And what kind of harvest comes from this except a sugar high and a new jean size anyway?

If, like Jesus, my food also is to do the will of my Father and work in the fields, my tan lines are pale, my neck white, and my shoes too clean.

If his will is brotherly love, perhaps instead of another brownie, an encouraging note to a fellow believer.
If his will is to share his gospel of good news, maybe coffee with an unbelieving friend to share his grace
If his will is to train my child in the way she should go, anticipation when naptime ends early instead of an eye roll.
If his will is to honor my husband, a simple thank you for getting up at 5:30 every morning to go to work so I can be home.
If his will is to care for the oppressed, a gift card to the food shelf, a bag of barely worn clothes for Goodwill, a visit to someone incarcerated, an offer of forgiveness...

My food Lord, my only fulfillment is you, and the working out of your will through my life.  Will I ever be full otherwise?  Others have done the hard work of sowing and your fields are ready for harvest!  May my eyes be open as your Spirit works in me, through me, that more than just I would be satisfied by you...

Giving Thanks:
#1 Toddler with eyes closed, smiling, flying down the slide
#2 30 quarts of pickles made with Mom

#3 Grampa and husband rocking and talking

#4 A day of farm exploring

#5 Baptism celebration and lives changed
#6 Bacon frying
#7 When only mommy can soothe