Good friends were not present in my life at the time. Christian ministry invited me in but connections were on the surface only. I was lonely. So I ate. A lot. Until I felt sick, and then the next day I'd do it all over again. Even look forward to it.
My eating habits are not as extreme as they used to be but when the right trigger comes along it's the same emotions and habits that surface. And so this journey...
Satisfy:
Webster-"to be enough for; to fulfill the needs or desires of, to give enough to"
Strongest NASB Concordance-"enough, filled, have abundance, have in plenty" (to name a few)
I used to pray this verse every morning: "Satisfy me in the morning with your unfailing love, that I may sing for joy and be glad all my days." (from Psalm 90:14)
And then I stopped. There is no memory of stopping but I know these words were not in my mind this morning, yesterday morning, or any other recent days. And temptation grew stronger and the battle was hard and sometimes I simply surrendered. Back to old habits.
Shame could consume. Frustration could overwhelm. Distance from God could grow. But he calls me back. To repent. To be forgiven. To try again.
And He shares this truth:
Job 38:25-27 "Who has cleft a channel for the torrents of rain and a way for the thunderbolt, to bring rain on a land where no man is, on the desert in which there is no man, to satisfy the waste and desolate land, and to make the ground sprout with grass?"
Only God can satisfy a place of waste and desolation. Sometimes it feels like that's where I am.
Psalm 81:16 "With honey from the rock I would satisfy you."
Psalm 91:16 "With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation."
Psalm 103:1, 5 "Bless the Lord, O my Soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! ...Who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."
Psalm 132:15 "I will abundantly bless her provisions; I will satisfy the poor with bread."
Psalm 145:16 "you open your hand; you satisfy the desire of every living thing."
Psalm 147:14 "He makes peace in your borders; he satisfies you with the finest of wheat."
Isaiah 58:10-11 "...if you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday. And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail."
Ezekiel 7:19 "They cast their silver into the streets, and their gold is like and unclean thing. Their silver and gold are not able to deliver them in the day of the wrath of the Lord. They cannot satisfy their hunger or fill their stomachs with it. For it was the stumbling block of their iniquity."
Ezekiel 32:4 "And I will cast you on the ground; on the open field I will fling you, and will cause all the birds of the heavens to settle on you, and I will satisfy the beasts of the whole earth with you."
There are approximately 11 different uses of the word satisfy between the old and the new testament and this in only one of them. Some of the others may be part of this study or these verses could be the guide right now. But today we definitely see that He is the one who satisfies. Only God. Sometimes He does satisfy with food, with wheat. Sometimes He satisfies by our desires. He always satisfies with good. Things that may not look good to us now, but that show us more of Him when we walk in step with the Spirit. When "they" tried to satisfy their own hunger they stumbled. I have been there. Have you?
Lord, satisfy us in the morning with Your unfailing love. That You would be our first thought. That our day would begin in Your presence. That we would be filled then. That we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Even just for the rest of this day Lord. Remind us that You are enough.
Resources: ESV Bible, NASB Bible, Webster's English Dictionary, The Strongest NASB Exhaustive Concordance
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