Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Gifts You'd Rather Not Open, But He's Waiting...

When someone you love calls to tell you they've had 2 scans because of a spot on their chest and are in process of scheduling a third, the air seems to leave your chest and your gut ties itself in a knot.

Or maybe that's just me.  My mind has been a fog since.  One minute I'm reminding myself we don't know anything definite and the next my chest caves in as I block out the picture of a world without her.  That world seems forever away and nearly impossible.

I just read a chapter in a book about fear of death and my pastor preached a sermon that included the same fear.  But that fear has a different face when the one wearing it doesn't know Christ.

My quiet time today included these verses:
Deuteronomy 30:19-20 "This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses.  Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him.  For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob."
Psalm 42:5-6 "Why are you downcast, O my soul?  Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.  My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you..."

Choosing life today, and choosing to remember You...
#74 Being able to love our little one through a messy night
#75 Phone minutes shared with friends
#76 Overage charges on the phone bill
#77  Candlelit worship
#78 The one who comes home to me every evening
#79 Communion
#80 Gray October days
#81 Hard phone calls
#82 Prayer
#83 Hope
#84 The Gospel
#85 The hardest one...that scary spot on her chest
Thank you, Lord, for these.

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